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Last night I headed off to my bed like, I suspect, a whole lot of Hearts fans thinking 'Why the hell should I give a shit when the players clearly aren't?'

As Shakespeare once noted: Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.  But then, after only five minutes in my scratcher, I had one of those epiphany jobs.  

The way to fix the current malaise is as simple as it is complicated (bear with me).

 

And that's what we need, somebody who is, for want of a better word ... infectious.  Somebody who draws people into their circle without them even realising it's happening.

As STV reporter Jamie Borthwick correctly pointed out last night...

And it hit me ... what Hearts need is a Kevin Kyle, a Craig Beattie even, dare I say, a Scott Brown or a James Keatings.  We need somebody within the squad who has an ability to unite the squad.

A manager, no matter how good at man management he is, can't do that.  He can set wheels in motion, encourage guys to get to know each other better, he can even organise events that he feels will help the squad become more close-knit.  But, at the end of the day, he's the boss ... he can only take it so far.

What the squad needs right now is a guy who, if he needs to, can take a player to the side and tell him straight that he's letting his mates down.  But he also needs to be the guy who will be the class clown ... the guy who hides somebody's shoes, clothes, car keys, and involves everybody else (including that day's victim on the next occasion) in it.  

Other than Callum Paterson, I can't currently think of a guy in our squad that can do that.  And, let's be honest, Callum has more to worry about at present than whether Struna gives two shits about Martin and vice-versa.

We don't have nearly enough "personality" in the squad at present.

Take the first guy I listed, for example... Kevin Kyle.

When he first signed on at Tynecastle he was pretty much left to sit by himself and have lunch.  On that first day he said to Jim Jefferies something along the lines of "Don't worry about me, gaffer, I'll be running the changing room by next week!"

And that's what we need, somebody who is, for want of a better word ... infectious.  Somebody who draws people into their circle without them even realising it's happening.

That's the simple bit ... that, as far as I can see, can sort out our squad.  We have good players ... they just need to become friends ... they need to care about each other.

One for all and all for one, and all that.

The complicated bit is ... where do you find such an animal?  What scouting system do you use to find one?

One who does have most of those personality traits, however, is currently available on a free transfer.  Ex-Hibs striker Tam Mcmanus mentioned him less than a week ago...

In terms of ability, would Gowser be a regular?  Would he fit the style and system that Cathro wants to play?  That would be for others, with far greater football knowledge than I, to decide.

In terms of personality I would argue that he has everything that we currently require.

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